Last night I fell asleep earlier than normal. I woke up and looked at my clock. I reversed the hands and thought it was 5:30 AM, my morning. The time I could get up and start my day. I felt excitement.
Then I realized it was 10:30 PM. I had only napped.
I have awoken at least four times throughout the night thinking it is morning and time to arise. Right now it is just after 4 AM and the anticipation for morning again, is heavy upon me.
I realized I’m dealing with revelation.
Meaning several things.
One, I anticipate morning because I want new days and God has them all lined up, sequentially, with appointed times for the sunrise.
Secondly, my anticipation is so great that I keep being ahead of schedule. I need to watch my timing lest I be in the dark, on a perilous trail in the middle of the night. Not good.
God’s timing means anticipate the sunrise but know He brings it. I can ready myself and capture the glorious sunrise at the appointed time–not before.
Third, it is a good thing to be expectant! I’ve had plenty of mornings, or thoughts of the next morning that gave me a sense of anxiety, general and specific fears, overwhelm, and even dread.
Now, even in tough transitions and nothing-easy-about-them circumstances I am sensing goodly anticipation…which is incredible–and as it should be!
Yet, now I feel like a rubberband that has been pulled back nearing the maximum pullback. Each hardship, challenge, and significant loss has stretched me back, and now I am ready to be shot out and into life with more energy, loft, and a trajectory. This makes up for the seemingly negative energy required for the pull back. The energy stored is what will takes me up and over–and into the distance with speed!
As always, these words aren’t meant solely for me. They are to challenge and encourage you–to meet YOU right where you are, in your unique circumstances.
It’s almost time for me to get up and do the day. The wait will be soon over. Morning will break.
September 4, 2016